On Monday night at 8 p.m. on ABC (check your local listings out west due to football), there’s a behind the scenes special on this week’s episode of EXTREME MAKEOVER: HOMES EDITION.
Here are my questions. I’m curious to see how many of these they actually handle:
Do you really want me to believe that you show up at someone’s house without warning on a Sunday morning at 7:30, yell into their house through a loudspeaker, and have them rush out of the house awake and fully dressed the next minute?
Do the families really leave twenty minutes later in a limo for a week’s vacation? Don’t any of these kids go to school?
Do you really want me to believe the design team comes up with something that afternoon?
Do you then expect me to believe that construction begins the next day based on those designs?
Do you expect me to believe that Ty finds a contractor on Monday morning and has him take a taxi to the house with a team of 100 workers right behind him?
Will we ever see a special looking back on the dream homes we’ve seen built? MONSTER HOUSE does it, and quite often we see the owners changing back some of the more crazy parts of the house. In EXTREME MAKEOVER, kids rooms are always designed around the kid’s interest of the moment. We know kids. They change wildly from month to month, let alone year to year. How many have repainted their rooms, ripped out the themed stuff, or are just unhappy with it now?
Look, the show is a lot of fun, even with all the maudlin bits. (“We’re not just changing a house. We’re changing a life.”) But my intelligence is a little insulted by the idea that rebuilding a house in seven days takes less than 24 hours’ planning, and an afternoon spent in Sears. I want to know what REALLY happens. How far in advance are these homes picked? How do they maintain the element of surprise for these families? Surely, they need to come into the house to measure, inspect, and create plans. Then, it takes appearances in front of the town council to get the building permits.
Right now, all the promos for the show indicate that they’re not really pulling back the curtain at all. They’re showing us cut scenes and cute funny stories that happen in the madness of building a house. I hope I’m wrong here, but somehow I doubt it.
So go ahead, Ty — answer my questions. Surprise me.