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We are also disappointed in not being able to successfully negotiate a new iTunes agreement with Apple.

Whoops.  Maybe we shot our wad too early.  Our bad.

We’re hopeful that we can reach a resolution before the existing contract expires. However, we felt it important to set the record straight.

We’re big losers.  Let’s see how we can spin this to make ourself look like slightly less big losers.

We never asked to double the wholesale price for our TV shows.

We wanted to triple it, really, but we figured starting at 2x would be a good base before leaping to 3x.

In fact, our negotiations were centered on our request for flexibility in wholesale pricing, including the ability to package shows together in ways that could make our content even more attractive for consumers.

If we could only FORCE customers to buy shows they don’t want along with the shows they DO want, perhaps the ratings on our poorly-written shows would go up!  Sure, that doesn’t make any sense, but this is NBC.  What more do you expect from us?

It is clear that Apple’s retail pricing strategy for its iTunes service is designed to drive sales of Apple devices, at the expense of those who create the content that make these devices worth buying.

Yes, Apple wants to screw Hollywood.  And, in that, they’ll have the backing of 95% of the tech community.  If iTunes could just charge more, NBC would save the creative community by keeping even more of the money and, er, well, wait.  That doesn’t work, either, does it?

In addition, we asked Apple to take concrete steps to protect content from piracy, since it is estimated that the typical iPod contains a significant amount of illegally downloaded material.

(See John Gruber.)  And then invoke the DMCA!  Furthermore, if you download THE OFFICE from iTunes, the terrorists win!  Terrorists pay $1.99 for 22 minutes of television.  God-fearing American freedom-lovers want to pay $5, dagnabit!

Furthermore, we want consumers to know that all our returning series, including new episodes, will be available on iTunes through the remainder of the contract, which expires in early December. Our content is also available on NBC.com, Amazon.com, and the soon-to-launch hulu.com.

Hulu.com is known internally as BWAH-HA-HA.com